sometimes....lab doom

sometimes excuses don't quite cut it for me. why must you make excuses for things that you are absolutely responsible for? why can't you prioritize things? if these things really do matter to you, then it should be as easy as learning the abc's. if you don't do it soon, the consequences that you face will be far more dangerous that you'd ever imagined.

sometimes my anger scares me nowadays. i keep my words and i do what i say. if you ever tempt me, i will go as far as i must to surrender to the trutfulness of my words.
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i am quite stunned at how things have turned out. from part a to part k in my life, nothing seems established. well of course, life is all about change. there is no set-point, no landmark that will absolutely be concrete for forevermore. but seriously, when the landmark is slowly sliding down a cliff, who is going to be there to stop it? certainly not i because i have been trying as hard i can with my bare arms to slow it down. i've worked out my biceps, triceps, and my calves in hopes to steady the change and slowly swing it back to + chart. but, as far as i'm concerned, with or without my help, some things are just inevitable. of course, this is just one part of my life that i have no way of holding it in my arms and point to which area that i know would need a conqueror.

part l of my life stands for LAB. it ended today as i took my final quiz and checked out of my locker. my locker, number 94, has been large and comforting. it must be because i have cooties or something but i did not have anyone sitting next to me in my whole row. luckily, the two girls that i have befriended made up for that missing minute detail. in any case, i felt like i was balling on the ground with tears streaming down left and right when i said goodbye to everyone, heh, without the tears and the insanity to lay on the ground. my lab friends were genuine; we all had a clean plate, no one was there to compete or judge each other for one whole semester. what am i to do during 230-520 every tues and thurs now? sigh. the fact that it is now a final goodbye...that is just deteriorating my fluctuating emotions. wow, and to think, i might be taking three lab classes next semester, how am i supposed to say goodbye to my new future lab friends? oh, these decisions to make! heh.